Where's my disclosure??

As anyone who knows me in person would probably verify, I am quite a patient man.

But you know, even I'm only human; and I'm getting seriously fed-up with Disclosure Scotland!

Having waited for word since last November, I rang their HR department in Glasgow to find out what the hold-up was and, as I expected, it was the ongoing lack of disclosure paperwork. There had been a slight query about my drving licence number, but they took the information over the phone, relayed it to Disclosure Scotland - who promised they'd phone me at the end of the week if there was any further news. To my amazement, they did precisely that, a week past Friday now, assuring me I'd have my disclosure "by the middle of the week".

I'm still waiting.

I mean - what exactly is it with those people? As far as I can work out, they just take as long as they take - because they can. Never mind my ongoing lack of occupation or life structure - or even the fact that the longer this goes on, the more likely I am to get depressed and not be able to do the job I've worked hard to get! And what about the employers? Surely it is a disincentive to them, to employ people who do not possess previous disclosure documentation (the existence of which makes a new application much quicker, as they only dig back to the date on the previous form)...

And you know the worst part of it? People keep asking if you're working yet - and you feel so stupid to tell them, no, you're still waiting for your disclosure to come through! I'm sure half of them must think I'm some master criminal with a dozen aliases - and most probably no job!!

Apparently, it takes longer if you've moved around a bit. People on the course who applied the same time as I did, who have only ever lived in Scotland, receieved theirs weeks ago. Alas, I am suffering because I lived in England for 25 years. It is after all only another part of the UK, which uses the same language, currency and communication systems - so you'd have thought they might have managed to speak to each other by now!

And spare a thought for John, who was also on my course. John used to be in the army, and has visited umpteen countries in consequence - and he's been told to expect to wait at least 3 months... I mean, hello - army - that's an official government entity with its own pretty robust security screening arrangements - why exactly do you need to mistrust their investigations - I don't think John was ever at Deepcut...

I wouldn't mind, but by the time I've done Enable's induction training, and am therefore available to start actually working, it'll be at least six months after the end of the last course - by which time I shall have forgotten half of that through lack of any opportunity to practically apply the theory - and that's a complete waste of other people's time and resources too.

Oh well... Rant over - for now!